THE RAPE GAME

Who would have ever wanted to be a participant in this bloody mayhem? Not I. Not anyone sane. But what in the hell is sanity when you are seven to ten years old, have been sexually abused by several people and resultantly have no concept of passing time.

I have no fuckin’ idea if I was seven, eight, nine, ten or eleven years old when I created the rape game.

Can you imagine this? A victim becoming a perpetrator? No fuckin way! Way. But, allow me to recant the events of the rape game that I invented. Whew, thank God for them, thank God for me, that no one got raped during this game. However….have either two of these children needed to seek therapy in the intervening years due to the pouncing, wrestling and horrific name/strategy and intent of game?

Hey, thank gods someone (those kids were sane) and mentioned to a parent later that day about the rape game…..said parent was not happy, talked to my mother about the icky situation and I was gravely assed embarrassed. Gravely. Gravely.

Who the hell wants to be a seven, eight, nine, ten or eleven year old girl that has invented and perpetrated the rape game? No girl at all is the fuckin answer dipshit.

Disclaimer: no orifice’s of any said kids I played this terrible game with got entered by anything; e.g. objects, dicks, fingers, limbs, knives.

One night, my sis and I are hanging out with two kids (I think they were girls, boy the mind so blocked and traumatized in my life at the time, don’t know 100% their gender!) probably girls, would have to ask my sister, she would recall just fine.

But basically, one day (not like we’d known each other that long) I suggest, “the rape game” it involves pouncing one another, well the rapist does, the “raped” fends off, a wrestling match of sorts ensues. So the game ended up being kind of like what I have just described.

Said rapist (don’t remember if said perp says anything threatening to target) but we pounced as perp and got on top of victim and then a mock fight, wrestling match ensues. No clothing taken off, perhaps there was tugging and pretend of ripping some clothing off. Completely do not remember this shit, if there was any.

So my point and story/sad recalling of this possibly tragic event is that sexual abuse really does suck. It immediately has the capability of creating IMMEDIATE perpetrators. Sexual abuse begets sexual abuse. Imagine that.

Now I sincerely hope the two kids in question (possibly both girls?) but what the hell, mind is not intact from that period (just like my flower may not have been intact after my own sexual abuse by the perp Danny. (won’t say his last name to protect the non-innocent.)

Don’t know either-whether I ever even had a fucking flower in my life. A lot of this stuff, I have learned over the years is kind of bullshit. For instance, some females are born with hymens, some are born with partial skin, some hymens cover the entire vagina area and some females may not have much. I do not know for damn sure what the hell happened. Don’t fuckin know.

And I hate those people that act like when someone is perpetrated on and they get help early-that they are smarter than the rest of us. Fuck you. Our brains are all different. Different. Everyone responds differently to sexual abuse and the brain is still a completely complex and vast subject that stupid humans barely know anything about yet. So there.

Fuck this patriarchal society of non-reporting, especially when so much sexual abuse takes place from the patriarch of the family. Good God, bad God. Why do so many humans sour? Why? At least (trying to pump myself to super-human status here) I stopped at between 7 to fuckin 11 at possibly turning into a demonic fucking monster of turning into a fucking rapist/murderer!

Good for me! And thank you to the wonderful people (won’t name the innocent) that were there by my side to stop this madness, e.g. the rape game and possibly one more attempt…..not rape game, but a flittering of a want at an attempt….so thank you wonderful person. (who was not sexually abused, but could have been) because the asshole who abused me brought a friend that was more innocent and nice and that good person, resultantly did not get abused! Thank God or whatever.

The Rape Game sucks. I’m sorry for your pain folks, women, men, girls, boys, both, trans, gay, lesbian, homosexual. We are all damaged to a degree from evil. What we as humans must discern when we have  been tragically affected is to stop and/or discern that what we are doing could metamorphous to something more terrible if we do not have an intervention of some kind/sort.

Thank God for those interventions. Thank God, we need more good people on the planet. Please.

Less rapists and murderers. Of course with such a population and even before this massive population it was inevitable. Sad. But true.

Whether nature or nurture or both (mostly mal-nurture I am certain) boys/girls are being ruined/raped/abused and turned into perpetrators and/or potential perpetrators. We need to do something about this. Or we won’t, because the U.S. has a very hush, hush society.

I wanted truly-from this semi-article, to get into the mind of a perpetrator, show you how their mind works. Truly.

Part II is coming.

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