Legal reincarnation

Legal Reincarnation

by Vasilika Vanya Marinkovic Secret World Entertainment ©

Senior Judge-Judge Preston was very happy to only have one hearing on this dreary Monday. Almost to the point of sheer giddiness due to this fact, he charged into the courtroom.

He startled the parties in the courtroom as they all looked as if they were expecting a boring case.

From what the Judge understood, this was one of those old “run of the mill” kind of  cases regarding litigation over late fees pertaining to overdue payments to the lender as to building and construction.

Further, Judge Preston’s law clerk had filled him in; At this juncture, the lender a very reputable bank was suing Jose Encarnacion and Co. due to the late fees they’d assigned in conjunction with receiving overdue payments on the construction of this damnable mall.

What he didn’t know was that his law clerk had gotten real drunk the night before, resultantly had a terrible hangover this Monday morning and had given the Judge the wrong case. But the defendants had similar names.

As a result, as far as the Judge believed, he was currently preceding over a banking and late penalties case. And the construction of this damnable mall was evidently proving a major headache for the respective banking institution in question.

If one asked Judge Preston, Phoenix sure as hell did not need another damn mall, no less the “Arizona de Palace” as the thing was being called.

After Judge Preston was gaveled in, he began in short order.

“All right, we need to clarify on the plaintiff’s error here Mr. Seizmore.”

“How do you mean your Honor?” begged Mr. Seizmore representing for the Arizona bank.

“Well, uh, you state here that the bank is suing Jose Encarnacion – hope I’m pronouncing that right –

“Your Honor-

But the Judge waved off his clerk and continued.

“It’s okay, I’ll get the clarification later. You state here, Mr. Seizmore, that the bank is suing over late fees-you yourselves have assigned due to the defendant’s Encarnacion and company being overdue in payments. That’s laughable and truth be told, just a little misleading.”

“Uh, your Honor, I’m just a little confused” stated Mr. Seizmore.

The Judge continued to inform. “I understand there may be a typographical error in the discovery in regard to wordage for monies owed and such. Obviously, Mr. Encarnacion will not be making any further late payments on late penalties. He will be making the late payments on their own merit.”

Mr. Seizmore stifled his laughter with a coughing fit. Meanwhile Both the Judge’s clerk and the defense counsel Ira Levine spoke unanimously.  

“Your Honor, the Defendant’s name is not Jose Encarnacion.”

“Well, I already stated that I may not be pronouncing the name correctly.”

“The case is about reincarnation.” Said Mr. Seizmore, stifling the ending with some coughing.

“Excuse me, what is this all about!” proclaimed the Judge, in a half question half statement as he was clearly caught off guard.

“Your Honor, there’s been a mistake in the paperwork” began the clerk.

“We know. I’ve just stated that for the record: I said-I understand there may be a typographical error in the discovery in regard to wordage for monies owed and such. Obviously Mr. Encarnacion will not be making any further late payments on late penalties. He will be making the late payments on their own merit.”

“We will gladly and might I say-rightfully-take the monies due your Honor.” Stated Mr. Seizmore.

“Your Honor, I object!” cried Ira Levine, but then her client stood up angrily and belligerently.

“My name is Jose Enriquez, not Re-incarnation. The case about reincarnation”  

 Judge Preston waved an accusing finger in the air.

“Now, I will be corrected in an error if I stated it. However, I did not state Jose Reincarnation. I stated “Encarnacion” or however you say it. I realize it is a Mexican word.

“Your Honor, I object.” Shot Ira Levine “For all intents and purposes Encarncion would be a Mexican name-not a word-but we are not arguing this today, because this strange non-word is not even a part of the defendants name.”

“Counterobjection your Honor.” Cried Mr. Seizmore, “If more money is owed. We would be perfectly willing to go along with it. I mean, it is not our firms fault if your clerks messed up with a typographical error and mentioned that monies were incurred over late fees over late penalties and charges do to the belated payments that were in fact late and/or in regards to another case entirely”

The Judge gaveled angrily. “What in blazes is going on here? I’m about to hold you all in contempt of court!”

“Your Honor” got in the clerk, “I think you’ve been briefed in another case; the Arizona Federal Bank vs. Jose Encarnacion.”

“Well Apparently!” cried the Judge. And he let the clerk continue.

“And we are on the case of Arizona National Federal Bank Vs. Jose Enriquez, not Jose Encarnacion.”

“Okay, so we need to ascertain just how late and just how much monies is owed Arizona national Bank due to the late fines and penalties that are making things even worse as we speak-and incurring even more fines.”

“Your Honor” the clerk tried to get in.

“I said and agree-that we’ll be more than happy to take even more money” offered Mr. Seizmore.”

Ira Levine stood up.

“I object once again your Honor. And further digress into this matter which has been clearly obstructed quite probably due to the plaintiff’s tampering with discovery and causing typographical errors in order to receive monies that aren’t due them and to dissuade our progression in this matter at hand.”

The Judge gaveled. “I repeat, what in Sam Hell blazes is going on around here! I want answers now!”

“Your Honor” Ira Levin continued, “the bank is owed no monies due to any types of illogical and/or incomprehensible late fees and /or penalties-that was their previous case this morning. They just want more money-and to not take this current matter seriously.”

“I never thought I’d heard myself saying this! In my eighty years-

“Forty” said the clerk.

“Whatever” barked the Judge and continued growling. “Never thought I’d hear myself saying this, everybody get to the point, or I will throw each and everyone of you in contempt of court!” and he gaveled illogically. The clerk looked frightened.

“I was not incurring any late fees at the bank-You are talking about another case with Hispanic builder-building the Arizona Mall! I owe no late fees!” cried Jose Enriquez.

“Then what in Sam hell are you here for?” said the Judge-a little too loudly.

“I’m not Sam Hell! I’m not Encarnacion. I am Jose Enriquez!”

“Get to the point-the heart of the matter!” barked the Judge, threatening by flailing the gavel in the air.

“I Jose Enriquez was kept maliciously from reincarnating while at the bank!” cried Jose Enriquez causing the Judge’s jaw to drop.

“Pardon me-what!?”

“Your Honor” said Ira Levine, “On November 4, 2011 Mr. Enriquez opened a new savings account at Arizona Federal Bank. And the banking officials were so slow that he was kept from metamorphosing into his former self, a Mr. Escobar Enrique Havier Prablamo Iglesias.”

“Your damn right it’s a problemo! What the hell is going on here? This case is about reincarnation! What the hell!”

And he gaveled. And yelled at himself- for his inappropriate use of language.  

“Not hell-reincarnation-it is a good and natural process-that the Arizona Feds kept me from due to their pandering of the white customers.”

“Order, order in the court!” and the Marshal’s came busting in not knowing where to go-not specifically seeing where the commotion was.

“Yes your Honor!” yelled Mr. Seizmore. “Even though the late fees we mistakenly discussed pertaining to our previous case with a Hispanic litigant we mistook for this case-that might have been Enriquez former self-we-the Arizona Federal Bank need to be given monies, reparations-anything for our pain and suffering sitting through this.”

“I need the Arizona Federal Bank to show they took a- too long and put other customers in front of me-while I sat there-and did not go back to reincarnation like previously destined! I was supposed to be Mr. Escobar Enrique Havier Prablamo Iglesias.”

“You and your Mother and Santa Claus!” shot the Judge gaveling down on his desk. “Order, order in the court! I hold you in contempt of court. I wish you would reincarnate yourself out of here!”

“Your Honor, I object!” cried Ira Levine.

“And I object to your objection” stated Mr. Seizmore.

“I sue the courts for not letting allowing me to reincarnate!” cried Jose Enriquez. “And what does Santa Claus have to do with any of this? If Santa were here, he would get me my reincarnation!”

The End